what i believe life should be.

find a passion and pursue it.
drink wine, eat great food and spend quality time with good friends.
laugh everyday.
believe in magic.
tell stories.
reminisce about the good old days but look with optimism to the future. travel often.
learn more.
be creative.
spend time with people you admire.
seize opportunities when they reveal themselves.
love with all your heart.
never give up.
do what you love.
be true to who you are.
make time to enjoy the simple things in life.
spend time with family.
forgive even when it's hard.
smile often.
be grateful.
be the change to wish to see in the world.
follow your dreams.
try new things.
work hard.
don't count the minutes count the laughs.
embrace change.
trust in yourself.
be thankful.
be nice to everyone.
be happy.
live for today.
and above all...make every moment count.

Have a merry, merry christmas.

Today, is Christmas. I have done nothing, but sit here..for six hours and occasionally grabbing some ham.
But it has given me a lot of time to think. I've actually been thinking a lot, for..the past week..or maybe two. time flies by WAY to fast. And so much has happened.
I was used, by who I thought was an amazing guy.
Men..full of sorcery.
But I have learned so much because of him, and what I went through. it was definately a positive situation.
So I do thank you Aaron, for being such a jerk. You taught me much.
I also have fallen for someone. I know what you're thinking...
"Geeze Emma, you move on fast."
But I never liked Aaron. I liked the idea of him.
this amazing guy has been in my life, for a little over a year now. And I think I've boiled it down to this:
There has always been something between us, whether romantic or not. and, I think I have just been looking over him, trying to find better, when the best has always been right here.
How does he feel? I have no idea..and it's killing me.
My best friend Jonathan says I have to wait for him to bring it up or make a move...BAHH. I'm dyeing. I like him. A lot.
I really have no idea what to do..
So basically, this past month has been crazy, and i'm extremely anxious about the new year.
But December has been good to me, because I have learned so much..
So to close this entry, I leave you with different quotes and pieces of advice that I have learned this month, that I hold dear.
-(in response to my fear of love)
" I tell you the truth...it is scary. Its scary as hell. But also, its the way we're made. Its the way we function. And you know what? someone is going to come along, possiblyy soon, and your going to give all of that to them. Its like skydiving. Your already up in the plane. You just have to decide when to jump. and I promise you this. When that person comes along, you jump...and it will be the greatest decision you will ever make."
- "Most of our obstacles would melt away if, instead of cowering before them, we should make up our minds to walk boldly through them."
-"there is no such thing as a mistake-only an opportunity for creative endeavors"
-"it's never too late to be brand new."
- "My heart hurt for so long, that I stopped listening to it, and only listened to my head. I just hope it's not too late to start following my heart again."
-"Even though a relationship may be difficult, if two people like each other, than it's worth it."
- I know I'll be okay, even though my skies are turning grey.
- Don't wait around for second chances, because life rarely ever gives them..just jump.
- "Even in a bad situation, there's always a positive side. even if you can't see it yet"

You.

Pros:

-he has the sweetest smile.

-he has the biggest heart.

-he calls me beautiful.

-I have never received better hugs.

-he always cheers me up; even the thought of him.

Cons:

-his personality is the exact opposite of mine.

-he lives far away.

So,

You would think, that the pros out weigh the cons here..

And that it's obvious.

Emma, you like the boy. Done deal.

Wrong.

I don't know what it is about me,

But I have a hard time loving him, when he's here. When he's away at college, I couldn't love him more. Okay okay. I take this back. I ALWAYS love him. Always. But I can't bring myself to "like" him when he's here. Got it? Well, I barely do. So I don't expect you too.

My question of the day is simply,

"why is it so easy to love you, when you're so far away, but it's so hard, when you're right here with me?"

this has been an absolute crazy month.

if i were to describe it in one word,

i can't even think of anything besides crazy.

but, it was good..i think.

i finally finished the Harry Potter series.

that was one of the most depressing and heart wrenching things i've ever experienced..

but don't worry.

it hasn't ended.

i've joined the Harry Potter club at school..

DUMBLEDORE'S ARMY

♥

Halloween, 2011.

"That awkward moment when you're dressed up as a ghost, and a black guy opens the door and stares at you like you're the KKK."

Ruth and i were first a clown and chef.

then round two-we were ghosts :]

also, i made Breanna's costume.

i made a dress :DD

i was accepted into NAU, on November 2. :)

but i don't think i can go there...

too cold. -_-

i found a whole YouTube episode channel,

dedicated to Kim Possible.♥♥♥

i'm almost finished with all of them.

i'm absolutely obsessed with Ron Stoppable..haha.

member winter formal?

we had our first activity. (:

we went to Veruccio farms,

and went through the corn maze,

and other silly things. 

it was a blast!

i entered a poetry contest..

and i'm a semi-finalist, and my poem is being published :D

this is the poem:

a new train 

everything falls apart
as you walk away from me.
you take your heart,
and leave me empty handed.
i've never felt so alone or lost.
I miss the thought of everything we could be.
now my mind is forced to follow a new track,
and board a new train.
there's nothing else to do
but just let my pain flow through my eyes
and onto the floor.
i'll never have you back,
or ever see you again,
my last memory of us,
is of you walking away.
you left me,
forcing me to hate you,
but I can't get over the fact,
that I still love you.
and a piece of me always will.

Ruth took some of my senior pictures.♥♥♥

^^^my favorite

ahhh, 

and now is the big news of the month..haha.

Aaron.

this kid i met on facebook..lolololol.

yeahh. i laugh about that fact all the time.

he's a ginger.

so i added him.

we had mutual friends,

so it wasn't thaaat sketch :]

well, we hung out..

and it was pretty freaking amazing.

like, the best three hours of my life.

not really, cause that's really dramatic,

but it was pretty awesomely up there[:

but it's hard.

because i haven't dealt with liking a guy, and him liking me back,

since ninth grade.

i really wish i could go back to,

 when i was little,

and i didn't even like boys,

or when i did,

it was the simplest and cutest thing.

cause now, it's basically difficult.

but he's sweet and awesome,

and he treated me great.

exactly as i want to be respected.

it's basically all so new to me.

he held my hand,

and kissed my forehead,

like a true gentleman.

i can't believe it even happened.

this kind of stuff doesn't happen to me.

but, i don't know what's going to happen.

we're just friends now.

and, that's okay,

because he's a really amazing guy..that i like.

oh geeze.

haha.

my best friend blogged about me.

http://ruthronin.blogspot.com/2011/11/tale-of-emma-decoto.html

it's the funniest thing you'll read xD

or maybe i was just streaming tears because i can remember everything.

i love our life and friendship together ♥

my friend Mark build a prayer/memorial garden at our church,

and my family bought a brick for my uncle who died three years ago,

and i found it♥♥♥

i love and miss you so much Uncle Mike.

Thanks to that cool kid Aaron,

i'm now obsessed with Hollywood Undead. 

this is my favorite song.

listen to it.

♥

yeah, it has some bad words,

but the chorus gets meeeee< 3

besides this, nothing else has happened that's quite epic..

besides winter formal.

but i don't have pictures yet,

so i'll update on that when i do :)

i leave you with this really inspiring video.

prepare yourself.

because after i watched this,

i could hardly even breath..

♥♥♥

for Adam.

i haven't blogged in forever!

since September sixteenth, to be exact.

and there has been one person who has asked me multiple times,

"when are you gonna blog??"

so,

this is for you, Adam. 

well,

it's been so long..i don't even know where to begin..

[emma facebook stalks herself]

ohhh! i remember now..

i hung out with my old friend Rachel Staples.

we got to catch up and watch Mulan..

life can't get much better than classic Disney movies.

i lost a friend..

ben?
from my earlier posts?

yeahh.

i said goodbye to him.

and anyone who knows me,

knows i HATE saying goodbye.

it's just not something i do,

or do easily.

but he wasn't what he seemed to be,

and not what i needed in my life.

a fake.

i saw and now own one of THE funniest movies.

EVER...

if you have not seen Bridesmaids,

you MUST see it noooooooooow.

I..uhm...

got a frapping job!!

yess,

yes i did.

ahh, i love it.

well, okay, i don't loooove it.

it kinda sucks.

but i'm a cashier..at Rally's.

what can i say?

[my personal statement does not reflect the view's of the company]

yupp..

i really just did that ^^^

i kinda have too...

lolololololololololololol.

i took a big step....

i asked someone to winter formal!!

Keith Konrad Heiner.

he's been one of my best friends since ninth grade.

i thought it be appropriate to make him my date for my first dance of highschool.

i got hit on by two black guys...again!

not even kidding.

so i know black guys like their girls big and white..

but come on!

hahaha. ohmyy.

but this time he actually asked for my number..

even after i spilled water on his truck

and my headset got pulled off my head like a loser.

ahh, i must be attractive or something?!
oh God, i hope so.

This song came out,

which gives me hope for the world.

it's beautiful and magical and so moving!

if you haven't heard?
listen to it.

live it.

i helped Laura Belle Davis ask her date to winter formal..

Tangled theme.

it was to die for..so cute!

random adventures like that,

just make my life!

i ventured on just about the best camping trip i have ever been on!

two of my bestest friends came with me, Laura and Jenny♥

we went with the junior highers to lake roosevelt,

for a beautiful weekend, lakeside!

it was so amazing!

we also made a new friend,

Mackenzie Teal..aka Mac.

the coolest little kid! 

he was so fun and got along just like Mac and cheese with us..

get what i did there? :D

i also had the boat ride of my life.

i was sooo sore the next day, i could barely move my neck.

craziest boat driver!

Jenny and i were basically Thor, and REFUSED to let go.

i'd have to say, and everyone on the boat would agree,

it was the most beastly tubing experience ever.

jen, laura and i also got to bond with two guys up there! 

john and john!

aka my pet mexican [jonathon islas]

and john okken...and may i bring this up..just one more time..

HIS NAME IS JUST JOHN.

it's not short for jonathon.

it frustrates me.

and apparently i'm the only one who sees anything wrong with this.

and mr mexican frapping added a 'h' in his name!

whatta punk!

whatever,

i'm over it..now..ahahaha.

i applied at colleges!

ASU & NAU.

i'm super excited..

i hope i get excepted!

i've already been excepted into GCU..

but i'm not sure where i wanna go!

O.o

i got my first paycheck, SONN!

nuff said :]

i got screwed over,

by someone i thought was my best friend.

i hate being treated like i don't matter.

it's not cool.

and i'm about to call her out.

i.

can.

long.

board.

and to any one who knows me,

knows this is a maaaaaaassive accomplishment.

since i basically have ZERO balance.

i've only majorly biffed it once so far..

i'm so proud of myself :D

thank you jonathon edward islas!!!!

[he taught me:D]

i'm pretty sure i found this guy on facebook..

i about died.

this is my favorite song.

haven't heard it?

it's a must.

now.

press play.

i spent a day with my Mexican.

we planned a sick trip to six flags..

interested?! 

hit me up! 

cause it's gonna be siiiick.

but nevertheless,

i love spending time with him,

cause he's one of my best friends,

and mentor..

oh!

and noooo big deal,

but i saw tayor swift in concert.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

:D

it was so amazing!

and beautiful!

and the best birthday present ever!

and i got to catch up with katie davis,

who i love dearly,

but never get to see.</3

and jenjen came too<3

who i love dearly as well.

it was one of the best nights ever.

i don't know how i'll beat it,

this senior year..

so yeah..

that's pretty much what's happened in the last month or so..

it's been a really good month,

when you focus on the good.

i leave you with this,

my current anthem..

NEVER GONNA GROW UP

NEVER GONNA SLOW DOWN

♥♥♥